Monday, November 29, 2010

RTS! OR, Premises and how quickly I abandon them

I was all set tonight to write about how exciting the field of ARG or Alternate Reality Gaming is becoming but then I finished off Thanksgiving leftovers which reduced my brainpower to such a reptile-like state that I had to reach into my emergency topic pile and pull out something safe instead. Sorry, ARG fans, your day will come, I promise. Also, I now have an excuse if this post reads about as well as a steaming turd.

When you (I) Google Image Search Alternate Reality Gaming, this is what you (you still) get.

Instead, we're going to be talking about the incredibly popular genre of (primarily) computer gaming known as RTS. For those of you reading this who SOMEHOW also don't know what RTS stands for (which is actually probably going to be a substantial number of people since I'm mostly hawking this blog on Facebook right now), I grant you Real Time Strategy. What this means is that while you're sitting there and strategizing, planning your moves, the computer or other human players are also doing their own thing. You know, in real time. As an extension of that concept, this also means that, unless you're Korean (and no, not that one, I'm talking about the one with individual freedoms) you're probably going to lose almost every game you play. I sure do, anyway. This in no way means I'm just bad at RTS. I DOES mean that, but it also means you're all bad at it, too. I'm sure you'll dig up some "concrete evidence" or something to the contrary but this probably just means you hate me.

Micro after the jump.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Amnesia. A trope, yes, but also the key... self-inflicted heart attacks.

Big ups to M0RG0TH13, bane of elves, dwarves, and men across the entire breadth of Middle Earth (not to mention my first commenter). To be honest I was terrified that this early in the lifespan of my blog, I wouldn't get a single suggestion for today's article. One is a pretty sweet step in the right direction.

Anyway, the suggested topic for this post is a little game called Amnesia: The Dark Descent by Swedish developer Frictional Games, creators of the Penumbra series. If you look around the internet digging for reviews and details about Amnesia, you're going to see a lot written about the efficacy this game enjoys as a constipation aid. THIS IS MY ONLY REFERENCE TO POOP IN THIS ARTICLE. It's been overdone and I don't want to be that guy.

Fight or flight after the jump.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Fishin' for topics and usin' apostrophes because finishin' verbs is UNNECESSARY

It's Holiday Hangover time. In tribute, or rather using that as an unrelated excuse, I'm going to take suggestions on what to write my next blog post about. The deadline for topic suggestions is Noon EST Saturday, November 27th. Hopefully it'll be video game related, but it's not necessary. After I decide on the winning entry, I'll have the post up later tomorrow. Suggestions may be made in the comments section here or as a comment on my Facebook page.

Don't sit on your hands! Let me give you a shout out! Suggest anything, as long as anything doesn't include me not writing. Don't be a dick.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Genesis of the Emoticon

Well, OK, not the FIRST emoticon. The one (my LOTRO guild and) I created and have tried to foster and nurture to prominence. The task is not an easy one.

Perhaps I should do some establishing first. We humans live a pitifully short time. The whole concept of legacy...creating something that lasts long after we're it a child, a novel, a legend,, in essence, a feeble grasp at immortality.

Founding Wendy's after the jump.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010


A vast what? It doesn't really matter. Hey, my name is Roger. This morning at work, I was in an infuriatingly mind-numbing meeting where I resolved to do absolutely anything else later in the day as a step toward reaching the unlikely goal of doing something more along the lines of what I WANT to do with my life.* I want to write about video games. I want to write about the video game industry. I want to make people laugh. I want to make people angry. At some point, I would like several sandwiches.

Toward that end, I started a blog. Not just any blog, mind you...but this blog in particular. You know, the one you're reading (somehow). You see, at some point during my life I got it lodged in my head that I could write at a level dangerously bordering on coherence. I have a knack, sometimes, for making people laugh. My parents decided that one of the best babysitters available to them when I was but a precocious tot was an Atari 2600 modded to play pretty much every game ever released up to 1984. They were right about that last bit.

It's the perfect storm. I am the perfect voice. I have the perfect sideburns.

Some days, I'll probably talk about a specific game tickling my neurons. Other days, I might take a look at (and then type a bunch about) trends. Just as likely as either of those topics, I'll rant about something completely unrelated. Want to know what's hot in the latest pet cactus names? Gotcha covered.** Interested (for some reason) on where I stand in the F2P vs. Premium MMO debate? I can help you out. Looking to inflate the ego of a hack video game nerd with either ebullient praise or the vilest of infernal flames? Boy, have I got a comments section for YOU.

I hope you enjoy your time here at this one (of infinite) corner(s) of the internet. It is an honor that you wasted your time with me. Check back for more!


*What a terrifying sentence. There will be more of these, I promise/warn you.
**The answer, as with most things, is Guy Carbonneau.